I woke up this morning with a twinkle in my eye
My mind was clear and I knew what to do
I took a swig of ale and I grabbed my best pal
It’s St Patricks Day, I’m Irish, Fuck You

We went to the parade, and we took off all our clothes
We jumped into the river turned to green
We drank that river down and we pissed out greenish brown
And now we’ll use our piss as kerosene
Had a black and tan and a whiskey or five
Enjoyed a bowl of Irish Stew
We streaked through a bar and then we blew up a car
It’s St Patricks Day, I’m Irish, Fuck You

I had a knife fight with a disabled man
Said USA and everyone cheered
Streaked through the parade went to church and then prayed
Then wrestled a midget with a beard (Oy!)
Thought I’d slow down so broke into a car
Drove up to Boston by noon
Got hopped on caffein and painted myself green
It’s St Patricks Day, I’m Irish, Fuck You

The night was finally nigh, we’d been drinking since 5
Guiness, Guiness, beer
The women looked great, and I knew that it was fate
I’d have a lass no matter front or rear (Oy!)
So I went up to a girl and I asked if she’d dance
She quickly turned away towr’ her boo
I punched im in is’ face and I killed him just in case
It’s St Patricks Day, I’m Irish, Fuck You

Our night was finally done, we’d been drinking had fun
I killed a man my buddy killed one too
All I have to say at the end of this day
IS
It’s St Patricks Day, I’m Irish, Fuck You x3